Typically in a divorce, one spouse stays in the matrimonial home while the other finds a new place to live. The spouse who remains in the matrimonial home may eventually choose to move as well, but due to financial constrictions surrounding a divorce, one person is likely to reside there at least for the short term. For the one left residing at the matrimonial home, the burden of packing personal and sentimental items may fall hard on their shoulders.
Heal First, Pack Later
If a couple has had a long marriage, then it is likely they possess an accumulation of memories and personal treasures from their years together. Being responsible for sorting through old photo boxes or trip memorabilia is not an easy task. In fact, it can be quite traumatic to have to relive all of the memories while coping with the pain of a divorce. ??It may be helpful to delay the packing process until absolutely necessary. Avoid facing your past while you give yourself time to heal in the present. As long as you have everything you need to live comfortably, it???s ok to keep certain doors closed while you let your new reality set in.
When it does come time to pack, either from necessity for a move or from enough time passing and it just being ???the right time,??? try not to tackle it alone. Having a strong support system is important when going through personal items from your past marriage. Since some memories may be happy and pleasant to reflect on, it would be helpful to have someone present who is neutral with respect to the separation so they can enjoy in the moments with you. Going about the packing experience with someone who dislikes your ex-spouse may make the process more negative than it needs to be. It is important for your own personal closure to find joy and peace in what made up your past.
Enlist a Friend
Sometimes a marriage can be abusive in nature or the divorce may have been quite hostile and there may not be any benefit to going through personal and possibly painful memories. If you find yourself in this situation it is perfectly acceptable to ask someone to pack up all personal items in your absence. There is no need to bring discomfort to yourself or to disrupt your life if there are simple ways to avoid it. Having someone else pack things up instead of yourself is one way to ensure your own comfort levels are not breached.
Remember that throughout a divorce it is important to have a strong support system in which to rely on. Use your support system and make packing up your house after a divorce as painless as possible.